i hate it when i have nothing to write about.  i want to write, i love it.  but i am stuck.
i got nothing

just some thoughts

i just wonder if am i ready? i dont think i am. i have time to enjoy life, why dont i?  my life is going to change soon, but not now, so why do i have to worry about?  i know why,  because that is all everyone talks about.  or is it just me?  why cant i just love life now. why cant i love myself, my family, my friends?  why cant i love the jokes, the moments, the awkward people, friendship, and haircuts?   why cant i love all of that only, and not ever stress about anythings, come on just relax

sometimes i kinda feel stupid, the proof is right in front of me.  but does it really measure my stupidiness? but no i know i am not stupid, but why do they make me feel like it.  why does that one little number make me feel like that.  its just a number right?  Wrong, it basically descided my whole life.

it frustrating.  why am i here, there is a better way of spening my time.  i kinda hate it, but it not so bad.  the only thing that is really getting me through this is money.  as least i am getting payed. plus my dad needs my help, i love him.  i can do it. i shouldnt act like that.  i will be happy about it.  it will make it better, i will have a better time.  i can smile.

hahah they make me laugh.  they are so weird together, but that is okay it makes me smile.  they like each other and they have fun.  i couldnt do it, but they are happy and i am happy.  it totally gives me entertainment, is that bad that i laugh.  i hope not.

so lesson of the day. it okay to worry, its okay to do your best.  but dont stress too much , be happy and smile and laugh everyday, its good for you and everyone around you.

Do i have to grow up?

i am at a weird point in my life. i am not yet an adult, but i am not a child anymore either, i am just in the middle. And sometimes i get confused who i really want to be. but after spending a day going to the bank, getting gas, and going grocery shopping with the cart. then, getting messy by using sidewalk chalk with little kids and decorating cupcakes, its not hard to make a decision.

it could have been worse

so yesterday i did something that i would normally never say yes to.  i went out on a blind date.  i know it is kinda wierd.  dating already is super awkward, but when you do it with a person you have never even seen before,  the awkward goes up a couple of levels.   but i have to say that it wasnt at all what i expected.  i was expecting to have nothing to talk about and just feeling wierd that whole time.  i was worried the kid was going to be a creep and i was going to be caught in a bad situation.  but it was so much better.  the boy i went with was really nice and most of the time we had a lot to talk about.  some parts were kinda wierd, but i was anticipating so much worse.  and in the end i am just glad i did it.  i think sometimes is good to get out of your comfort zone and do something that you would never do. its better to wake up each morning not knowing where life is going to take you.  it might not alway be what you want, but it makes life totally unpredictiable.

spring break is here
im feeling good
theres so many things to do,
so many possibilites

its plain and simple

it is amazing how i am feeling crappy one week and feeling the total opposite the next. today was fantastic, and i am just simply feeling good.
i slept in a bit, so it started off good
i had a pretty yummy breakfast
it was warm so i got to wear my super stylin sandels
we played a game in seminary and my team won, and who are we kidding, it was all because of me
also i won a bet between friends, someone owes me something incredible from the D.I
history was as funny as it usually is, and i got to go to a super secret place in the school, even though  it was breaking the rules
we had a lab in sports med that was actually kinda fun, and it was way better than taking notes
i got a 104/100 on mi examen de espanol
the history review was canceled, and you know what that means NO CARPOOL!
and it felt so good outside, i was acutally able to roll down my window.
there is no comparison between last week and this week so far.  i am just am happy today, plain and simple.

this week has been off
i dont know whats wrong
i havent been happy
being sick may be part of it
but its only an excuse
i cant help but think
its probably all in my head
but what if its not